My reaction to the election of Donald Trump as the next President of the United States

I've taken today off work to recover from our trip to Houston for our nephew's wedding and to get some stuff done around the house.  It was a fun trip, but tiring, especially after spending 6 hours at the airport yesterday!

I've  decided to re-start my blog, having been "inspired" by the election.  I'm not saying that my blog posts will be exclusively related to the Trump presidency, but that will be a common theme.  I want a place that I can elaborate more than is appropriate for Facebook, but will figure out a way to link this blog to Facebook as a means of letting people know what I am thinking (that is assuming anyone cares!).

I've been anxious and depressed since the election.  I am worried about equal / civil rights for women and minorities, foreign relations, economic collapse, but most of all, climate change. Trump is a climate change denier,  has vowed to withdraw from the Paris climate change agreement, and has put another leading denier in charge of EPA transition.  I am researching the NRDC (National Resources Defense Council) to determine whether to donate and get involved thuere.  Having said all that, Trump is our next President, he was elected fair and square under the rules of our election system, and deserves to be given the opportunity to show how he will really govern.  Governing is different than campaigning and he has shown in recent interviews (I recorded his interview on 60 Minutes last night, and will watch it this evening) that he may be a more reasonable man than the buffoon on the campaign trail.  From what I've read so far, he told people to stop the harassment of Latinos and Muslims (although he should accept some responsibility for what is going on), he has moderated his stance on Obamacare, talking about tweaking it rather than repealing it, and he has softened his stance on appointing a special prosecutor to go after Clinton.  That would be a waste of time and resources and contribute further to the divisive atmosphere that pervades our country right now.  There's much more I would like to hear him say, but this is a start in showing that he can be reasonable.

I want Trump to succeed, because if he succeeds, then we all do.  I hope he is successful at unifying the country.  I hope he is deliberate and thoughtful, not rash and impulsive.  I hope he appoints good advisors and listens to them.  However, I will be vigilant in watching what he does, and will not be shy about voicing my opposition when necessary, via letters to my congressmen and to the Trump administration.  Godspeed Mr. Trump, but we will be watching.

Reflections while reading the novel "Stone Arabia"

Reading this novel by Dana Spiotta is bringing me back to some sort of primal urge I have to blog and "document" my life. The character Nik does this in an extreme manner, creating an imaginary world wherein he is a rock star; his world includes fake album reviews and obsessive fans. The narrator of the book, his sister Denise, lives vicariously through the lives of others, getting lost in celebrity murder / suicides to the point of scouring the Internet trying to recreate the events that led to the tragedy that made the 24 hour news cycle for just about that long. What causes us to connect our lives to these stories, to become emotionally involved with the lives of people we've never met? I don't usually get deeply drawn into lives outside my own, but I did when John Lennon was shot and killed. I felt truly as if I had lost a friend and obsessed over every detail of that night, and the road his killer took toward that violent ending. For days (weeks?) I listened to nothing but Lennon / Beatles music. I'm sure there have been instances since then when I took a little too much interest in the life of some celebrity, but that is the example that allows me to understand the feelings when I see someone else go through that.

The novel explains this tendency as our attempt to escape our own subjectivity, to "give us a glimpse of ourselves connected with every human". That sounds like what draws me to wanting to blog, to connect to others in a way that affirms our own existence. Except that I feel that I rarely have anything interesting to say! I read other blogs, with their ability to tie random, seemingly innocuous observations into some greater truth. I envy that. It's the same ability that a good photographer has to capture the essence of a moment, or the simple beauty of nature in a way that speaks to all of us.

I've always thought of myself as a good writer, but I lack the creative spark to be able to turn these mundane moments into "art". I keep hoping I will be struck by inspiration. Part of my problem (or my excuse anyway) is that I am so busy with my job and my responsibilities, that any creative impulses I have are drowned out. I've been off work now for 7 days and I suddenly felt the desire to relate what I was reading into this blog, so maybe there is something to that?

For those of you who blog, how do you make the leap from the mundane to something universal?   Does it come naturally?

My Stewardship Journey

I wrote this for inclusion in a Thanksgiving devotional our church is planning to distribute in November.  Since I haven't written a blog in forever, I decided to post it here as well.  Let me know what you think.

I didn't become a Christian until I was 30.   Before that, whenever I went to church, I was hyper-sensitive to any talk of money.   If you had asked me at that time, I would have agreed with the common perception that churches talked about money too much.

When I did join the church, I was happy to accept all the gifts that church could bestow on me; nice sanctuary, new classroom, beautiful gym for my son to play ball and roller skate in, etc.  As a token of my appreciation for these provisions, I agreed to be a "regular giver."  However, the amount I was "regularly giving" was not very much, certainly nothing near a tithe.  Part of me would still cringe whenever that passage about the "cheerful giver" was read aloud.  I continued to attend for years, but after the initial excitement of finding Jesus, I have to admit my spiritual growth became stunted, as did my attitude towards giving.

Then I discovered the Disciple Bible Study program.  Disciple I is a 35 week high level study of the entire Bible.  More than that, it is a transformational experience that promotes spiritual growth through daily Bible readings and in depth discussions with other Christians who are trying to deepen their faith.  I always think of Romans 12:2 where Paul instructs us to be "transformed by the renewing of your mind".  This is what it took for me to begin to understand what Christ is calling us to do.  He wants us to give all of ourselves, to hold nothing back, to "offer our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God" (Rom 12:1).

So at this point, I knew what was expected of me.  However, I did not become a cheerful giver, much less an extravagant giver, overnight.  I wish I could say there was one moment, one sermon or one Bible verse that turned me around.  But just as my faith journey did not include a "road to Damascus moment" so too did my stewardship journey take time for me to internalize the head knowledge I had gained into a heartfelt understanding.  Continued involvement in Disciple, Sunday School classes, sermons,  service projects and personal Bible reading and prayer finally helped me to recognize all the blessings that have been bestowed upon me, but more importantly, I learned that being a Christian isn't about taking, it's about giving.  It's about sacrifice.  It's about taking the salvation message of Christ into the world.

I am happy and honored and blessed to be able to do my part.  Christian stewardship isn't an obligation, it's a privilege!  Thank God for trusting me to use the money, talent and time he has given me in order to help others and to reach others with the love and joy of Christ Jesus!

My dad, Keith Lohmuller

My first blog was about my dad.  I haven't written one since July of last year, so it is fitting that this blog be about him also.
My dad died in February. He lived 19 months with esophageal cancer. He maintained a positive outlook through the entire time, and we were blessed that he never really suffered much pain. Over time, he slowly lost any ability to swallow, and that produced complications along the way. He had trouble sleeping during his last months, and he spent 3 months getting all his nutrition from his feeding tube. He slowly became weaker, but he continued to play bridge at the bridge club, up until about 10 days before he died. He went into the hospital with pneumonia on Feb 1st, and got out in time to watch the Super Bowl at home. Jeff (my brother) and he had a Sunday tradition of watching football together. I joined them a few times in the past year, and on that last Sunday, both Kathy and I made it over to watch the game with him. We had high hopes that he would be in better health after the hospital stay. He had a stent put in his esophagus, and he was actually able to swallow some liquids and soft food. When we brought him home, we stopped at a McDonalds and got him a mocha frappe, which he loved and used to buy every day before he was unable to swallow. The day he died he actually had cheesecake and coffee for breakfast! Unfortunately, he continued to have difficulty breathing after he got home. We hoped that would improve, but Lisa(my sister) took him to the doctor on Wednesday and the doctor was so alarmed he sent him immediately to his oncologist. Dr D, as we called him (Dubovsky) recognized that he was end stage. Earlier, Dr D had told us that Dad had blown past the bell curve of expected survival rate for the type and stage of his cancer at diagnosis. Recognizing that we were near the end, I called and wrote friends and family and asked them to come visit soon if they wanted to see him. My intention was to celebrate his life while he was still around to participate in it. On the Friday he died, I called hospice, hoping that a portable oxygen tank would help him regain some strength and energy. I did not expect and was not mentally prepared for him to die just yet, I figured we still had several weeks left. But that was not the case, and he died peacefully about 11pm that night, with Jeff and Lisa by his side. His last conscious activity was to watch his beloved Jeopardy with Jeff and Lisa and Jeff reports that Dad still got more correct answers (or questions, actually)than either of them!

Since his death, I have been blessed to hear many tributes to the man that he was. When I called lifelong friends, they gushed over things he had done for them and with them. I called a boyhood friend in CA, and we talked about some of the mischief they had gotten into. I told him that Dad had always "blamed" him for being the instigator, and he agreed. Several of his coworkers from NCR have written tributes to him. All have talked about his generous personality, his compassion, his intelligence and keen sense of humor.  One letter called him a pioneer of the computer age, and talked about how he helped many companies move from mechanical accounting to the computer age.  Others have talked about how he helped them move forward in their careers, but also mentioned how much fun they had over their lives with he and Mom.  It's been such a blessing to hear about the lives he has touched and to know that he had such a positive influence on so many lives.  He also leaves a beautiful legacy in the lives of his children and grandchildren.  The tribute that touched me the most was written by my daughter, Rebecca.  I can't describe it, you have to read it. I will post it in a subsequent blog.  If you want to know who my dad was, take a minute and read it.

I am sorry to  run on so long.  I have probably violated all the rules about blog length!  I originally intended to write this about the struggles I have gone through since his death, but instead the blog wrote itself and turned into a tribute to Dad.  God had other plans!

Grandad Keith Memoir

I promised in my last blog that I would post this tribute from Rebecca to her Grandad Keith.  She wrote this the day after he died and we had it framed at his visitation.  Please take a minute to read it.

For my Grandad Keith:


It’s hard to sum my Grandad Keith up in any one word or category. He represents so many things in my mind. I have always considered him a man of refined taste—I picture him alongside nice restaurants with black napkins, fancy wines that I can’t pronounce, and classic Bloody Marys—almost a James Bond (he looks so handsome in the old pictures). He was also a philosopher; no conversation could remain surface level with him—he always expressed deep conceptions behind every notion—everything he believed had been pondered through and through. I can’t remember ever leaving a discussion with Grandad without feeling thoroughly outmatched and feeling like I had learned so much. But he never belittled anyone. I respect his wealth of knowledge greatly. He was also a historian in his own way--he remembered so many stories from his own life, from my dad and his siblings’ lives, from my life, about Nana…so many great intriguing stories from a life well-lived. His memoirs are fascinating and amazingly detailed. And he was a historian of things outside his own life as well—TV shows, movies, sports, books, politicians. No conversation with Grandad would be complete without a quote or story from a TV show, book, movie, or distinguished person.

But despite all these other things, Grandad has always defined love and sensitivity for me as well. The love he and Nana shared could inspire any great playwright. In one glance at Nana or even Nana’s picture, Grandad demonstrated more love than many feel in their entire lives. And this extended to Grandad’s kids and grandkids. He loved so deeply and fully and was not afraid to say it—joyfully or tearfully but always sincerely. From the way he answered the phone when I called or said my name to others I could always tell that I was precious to him and that he was so proud. And I have always so admired how well he preserves connections and friendships with others. So many people in this world let friendships fade or destroy relationships over small things, but Grandad always treasured every person in his life continually no matter what choice they made or what situation changed. So many of my memories of Grandad are not about events or places but are about people and family moments—heartfelt dinner conversations at Thanksgiving or Christmas, long quiet breakfasts of coffee cake with him and Nana, long casual chats in the sunroom over appetizers, playing games in the pool or the hot-tub or on the rope-swing, reading books in Lisa’s old bedroom…. In all these different places I can picture his smile, hear his laugh, and see his love-filled eyes. He will be sorely missed, but my life will forever be different because of the love he shared with me during his life.

With prayers and respect and so much love,

Rebecca Elise Wright, granddaughter of Grandad Keith

Me and the Tea Party

I have seen the error of my ways!  I am joining the Tea Party!  All my conservative friends have finally had their influence on me.  No more nanny state.  No more ObamaCare!  Let private industry reign supreme, we can trust them (except maybe BP).

Government is Evil!  Government is Bad!  Let's start with the Feds - according to the Constitution, the only thing the Feds should do is protect our borders.  Heck, in Arizona, we (I say "we", because after all, we are ALL Arizonians!), we don't even need the Feds to do that.  Let's just form our own militia and keep the evildoers out of our borders.   Second Amendment Baby!!

Once we get rid of the Feds, we can go to work on the State Government.  They're just a bunch of fat cats anyway (especially in Georgia!).  Who needs the state to tell us what we can do with our water?  The water is in Georgia, we'll do what we want with it!

Next up is local, county and city "gummints".  Dump them as well.  Who needs fire and police protection?  If a house catches fire, let it burn.   As long as it's not my house, why should I care?  We'll fight our own crime with our own guns.  Once everyone carries, no one would be stupid enough to mess with us, right?  They can have my gun when they pry it from my cold dead fingers!

As the hippies used to say, it's time to go back to the garden, or perhaps the jungle.  Survival of the fittest - that's the Darwinism I believe in!  Let the strong survive, let the weak eat dust.  As Jesus said, "To thine own self be true" (maybe it wasn't Jesus, but it was SOMEBODY important!).

In closing, I ask for your vote.  Elect me, and I will go to work for you to start dismantling the government piece by piece until there's nothing left.   Trust me ...

Health care debate gets buried by hyperbole

This blog was inspired by seeing this billboard posted on facebook:



One of the comments underneath the facebook posting of that billboard reads "I have my gun ready."   This is ridiculous!  Methinks the rhetoric and hyperbole have gone too far.  I don't remember the reaction being this strong in 2003 when Bush involved us in an (IMHO) unnecessary war that killed thousands of Americans. Other examples just from this morning's read of the newspaper:

• several states threatening lawsuit over the 'unfunded mandates' of the health care law (nevermind that the charges to states budgets don't kick in until 2017 and then only a small percentage)
• protesters hurling racial and anti-gay epithets at Congressmen on Sunday (the irony being that John Lewis was one of the targets ... kind of takes you back to the '60s, doesn't it?)
• Sarah Palin saying "Don't retreat, instead RELOAD"
• all the comparisons of Obama to Hitler and Stalin

It's perfectly fine for people to protest our government and it is our right to vote against incumbents that we don't like.  But when people resort to violent rhetoric (and actions) a line has been crossed.   I am actually starting to feel nervous that we are headed for a violent split in this country.  Technologies such as twitter and facebook have helped to amp up the volume.  Our divisions seem to be deepening, and hardening and we are forgetting the many things that unite us.  Politicians on both sides contribute to this by demonizing their colleagues in the other party and by drawing comparisons to socialism, totalitarianism, even fascism!  Go and read up on those ideologies and you will see that nothing that we are doing today remotely approaches those forms of government.  Yes, the Obama administration believes that government has a role to play in the protection of the people; reasonable people can disagree with that and prefer to let the free market sort things out.   That's what elections are for.  My point is that we should engage in a reasonable debate over the role we want government to play.   Let's do that and drop the hyperbole.

As to the health care law, I have a couple of points I want to make, with regard to some of the reactions I have heard:

• People are criticizing Congress for going against the wishes of their constituents.  They forget that Bush was praised for not being a slave to the polls.  They also forget that in 2006, Bush ignored a wide majority of the American public and the recommendations of his own blue ribbon, bipartisan panel, and he escalated the war in Iraq by going forward with the surge.  Guess what - that worked out pretty well!  Sometimes a politician has to do what he or she thinks is right even if public opinion is opposed.
• The issue of the constitutionality of the individual mandate is very interesting.   Supporters cite the commerce clause as justification.  I read one blog that said that, while the current interpretation of the commerce clause probably exceeds the original intent of the framers, several Supreme Court decisions in the mid 20th Century expanded the modern definition of the clause to cover a wide range of legislation.  Other examples of individual mandates include Social Security and Medicare taxes, and income taxes in general.  So there is precedent, and the likelihood of the issue even getting to the Supreme Court is remote.  Most scholars that I have read believe that, despite the current conservative leaning makeup of the Court, if it did reach that far they would uphold the law as written.  As recently as 2005, Justice Scalia wrote "noneconomic local activity" can come under federal regulation if it is "a necessary part of a more general regulation of interstate commerce." 
• The other constitutionality argument being made by several states is that the government is imposing an unfunded mandate on the states by expanding Medicaid.  Here, the "supremacy clause"(Article 6) states that "the laws of the United States ... shall be the supreme Law of the Land".
• The health care law is not a "socialist" law.  A single payer system would be an example of a socialist policy.  Even with the "public option" this type of legislation was never part of Obama's recommendations.  The law Obama signed on Tuesday keeps private insurers in place, and is, in fact, a very moderate change in policy.  Yes it will cost more, and there are legitimate concerns about what it will do to the deficit.  However, it is not socialist.

OK, I've had my rant.  Feel free to comment / rebut as you see fit!

Random musings from sick bay

I'm not really much of a blogger, given that this is my first (attempt) at a blog since mid November.  I've always thought of myself as having some writing talent, but my life is (thankfully) pretty boring and there's just not that much inspiration.

So what prompted this blog?  Only the most boring weekend I've had in years (which is not in and of itself a bad thing, mind you!).  I was supposed to go to Brunswick with Kathy on Friday to see the grandkids but my 10 day old cold turned into a sinus infection on Thursday night.  With the way I was coughing, Kathy (rightfully) declared that I had no business hanging around a 1 year old (or a 6 and 4 year old for that matter!).  So she went on to Brunswick and I went to the doctor and got some antibiotics.

I'm always saying I wish I had more time to read.  So here I am with 3 days stretched out in front of me with no obligations, and what do I do ... I rent 3 movies!  My excuse was that I didn't have the mental energy to focus on a book (I did catch up on Time Magazines!).  So I rented 3 pretty mindless comedies, all of which were entertaining enough to keep my mind off how badly I felt.  What were the movies, you ask?  Well, I'm almost embarrassed to say, but here goes ... "The Simpsons" (I have never watched the TV show and I am always missing character references); "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist" (the music was pretty good and Michael Cera and Kat Dennings were good together) and Woody Allen's "Whatever Works".  That was the best one, but I have always enjoyed his movies (even while not approving of his life choices!).  I don't usually like Larry David, but he was softened by Evan Rachel Wood, one of my favorite actresses, who was barely recognizable in this movie.

I did do some chores, caught up on laundry, read my Disciple, and kept the kitchen cleaned up!  One strange thing I did was re-read the entire US Constitution and Declaration of Independence!  Why would I do that?  Someone at church made a comment the other day about this being a "Christian nation".  Depending on what you mean by that, that can be true or not true.  But it prompted me to do a little research about Jefferson and Madison, and while doing so, I decided to go straight to the source.  It reminded me that too often we all form our opinions based on other people's opinions without making any effort to focus on the source, whether that be a book or an essay or a speech or whatever.    With the internet we often have the opportunity to see for ourselves but instead we let talking heads tell us what to think.

OK, that's my philosophical comment for this blog.  Over and out!

What does it mean to be "saved"?

I'm taking a Disciple Bible study course called 'Christian Believers', which is a study of theology and why we believe what we believe.  The current chapter is on salvation.   One of our readings is from Georgia Harkness, a Methodist theologian who died in 1974.  She writes about the change in our life that results from the experience of salvation:  "Sometimes the change is so radical that it seems miraculous.  Sometimes there is a gradual ... almost imperceptible, change in values, motives, feelings and modes of responding to situations.  If there is no difference at all, regeneration has not occurred."

Salvation is one of those 'churchy' terms that means little to non Christians.  I grew up outside the church.  I was 30 years old when I accepted Christ as my savior.  But what does that mean?   The common definition is that Christians believe we are given eternal life, in heaven, with God.  I believe this to be true, though I dare say I don't pretend to understand what that life will look like.  However, to me the Christian life, and the saving grace that Christ offers to all of us, is so much more than some intangible future reward.  John Wesley writes that salvation is "a present salvation.  It is something attainable, yea, actually attained on earth by those who are partakers of this faith."  He writes that salvation "implies a deliverance from guilt and punishment."  To me, salvation frees me to fully experience all the joy that God means for us to enjoy today, on this earth, now.

When I became a Christian, I did not experience a radical, overnight change in my life or my general outlook.  I was not magically transformed.  Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 5:17 that "if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation."  Since I didn't have a sudden overnight transforming experience, I occasionally wondered if that meant my conversion was not real.  But over time, I did start to notice subtle changes in my outlook, and in the way I treated others.  As I studied the Bible, and took part in small groups at church like Disciple and Sunday School, I learned more about what it meant to be a follower of Christ.  It's not just a question of saying "I believe in Jesus" and saying I am sorry for my sins.  In an earlier chapter of the course I am taking now, we talked about "cheap grace" being the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance.  Sacrifice of self is required.  Acts of service toward others is required.  But the great thing is, that if you spend time in prayer and study and worship, you find yourself wanting to do these things.  It is part of a natural (if in some cases, gradual) transformation!

So, Harkness nails my experience exactly, and reassures my own doubts about my salvation experience.  It doesn't have to be an overnight change.  One of the greatest compliments ever paid to me was when my dad, who is not a believer, told me he thought that I had become a better person since I became a Christian!  Salvation (and sanctification - a whole separate topic!) is an ongoing process.  The goal is to become more like Christ every day.

Baseball Playoffs are here

The baseball playoffs are here! Tis the season for exciting pitching, great hitting, climactic moments ... most taking place well after my bed time! How I long for the days of daytime postseason baseball, smuggling a transistor radio into school (or the office)! The greatest example was 6th grade in 1969, the year of the Miracle Mets against the powerful Orioles, when Eddie Zelkovsky (sp?) had a radio in his desk with a wire under his shirt and into his ears. We were doing fine, passing notes after every inning, until all of a sudden Eddie leaped out of his chair and yelled "Clendennon (Mets 1B) hit a homer, Clendennon hit a homer!" The teacher was on to us, but her only question was, "Eddie, what is the score"?!

I have been a Dodger fan all my life, save for the few years when Rupert Murdoch owned the team and traded Piazza and forced Lasorda out and tried to erase all Dodger tradition. Over the 20+ years in Atlanta, the Braves have supplanted the Dodgers as my favorite team, but some Dodger blue blood still courses through my veins. This year's team has some exciting players, James Loney, Andre Ethier, Rafael Furcal, Clayton Kershaw and Randy Wolf among them. There is also some guy named Manny, about whom I have very mixed feelings. I want to root for the guy, even when he was in Boston, but he makes it tough with his "me me me" attitude and of course his steroid abuse. Still, I hope he gets hot, because without him, the Dodgers don't advance.

In the A.L. I am for anybody but the Yankees! Go Twins! Overall, I am rooting for the Red Sox, if only because I just bought a Red Sox hoodie to stay warm when I was at Fenway last week! No, I have always liked Boston, especially Dustin Pedroia, Jacoby Ellsbury and of course YOUK, Kevin Youkilis.

My picks ... my head says Cards over Dodgers, but I am going with my heart and picking LA; I have to go with Philly over Colorado, and I am going with my heart again and picking the Dodgers over the Phils. In the AL, much as I would love to see the Twins knock the Yankees off, I don't think it will happen. The Red Sox - Angels series could be a classic; I am picking Boston to win. That leads to yet another Boston - New York ALCS ... Boston owned the Yanks early in the year, but in the second half, no one could beat the Yankees. I HATE to do this, but I am picking the Yankees to win the AL pennant.

So that leads to a traditional Dodgers vs Yankees World Series. I just finished a book on Jackie Robinson, and a great WS between the 2 that year (of course the Yankees won). Again, my head says you gotta go with the Yankees to win it all; my heart is with LA, but if I had to be real money, I'd pick the Yanks. They are just too strong.

So bring it on! Who needs sleep! The Dodgers game starts at 9:30 tonight!

Sex, Religion and Politics

Sex, religion and politics. These have always been the 3 things that you don't discuss in polite company. I am pretty good about staying away from talking about sex; however I am not as successful at staying away from the other 2. I have never been afraid to share my Christian faith, as I feel it is my obligation to talk about the impact that Jesus Christ has had on my life. Regarding politics, I have always enjoyed a good give and take with someone who approaches things differently than I do.

That kind of person is not hard for me to find! I consider myself to be slightly left of center on the political spectrum (of course, we ALL think we're moderates!). Between my friends at church and my co-workers at EMC, most of the folks I see every day are conservatives. I would consider many of them to be very right of center, but then again they probably see me as a "tax-hiking, government-expanding, latte-drinking, sushi-eating, volvo-driving, New York Times-reading, body-piercing, Hollywood-loving left-wing" fanatic! In fact, I do not drink lattes or eat sushi and I do not have any body piercings!

Since I have so many friends who are conservative, I can attest to the fact that there are good folks on both ends of the spectrum. Being a Democrat does not mean that you are Godless and being Republican does not mean you are heartless! Through personal experience I know that Republicans can be compassionate and service oriented and Democrats can be spiritual and place a strong importance on personal responsibility.

The problem is that these political discussions can sometimes get personal. I try to remain "above the fray" but I can start to feel defensive when I feel that I am being personally criticized for my beliefs. This has happened to me more often in the past year than ever before. My conservative friends were energized by the election last year, particularly after Palin was named McCain's Veep choice (which was also the precise moment I made my decision to support Obama). They remain fired up by the greatly expanded government intervention in society (I think we can all agree that government is more intrusive than ever, the disagreement comes when we discuss whether this intervention is necessary to turn around the economy and whether it will be temporary or permanent). This has led to an increase in the number and intensity of discussions.

It doesn't help that there is no longer one version of the truth. We can no longer even agree on the same set of facts! There are so many media and internet outlets available that you can choose to listen only to people with the same beliefs as you. I think it's important that we try to get both sides of issues that we care about. I get most of my news from NPR, Time Magazine, AJC and CNN, which conservative friends think are all liberal mouthpieces. I would agree that many of the reporters for those outlets probably tend to be left leaning, but I also believe that they all make sincere efforts to represent both sides and they all employ and feature very conservative columnists / talking heads. I intentionally seek out and read conservative columnists like George Will, Charles Krauthammer and David Brooks, specifically to get a different perspective. I happen to be a big fan of Brooks; we often disagree, but I appreciate his thoughtful approach to most issues and he does not see Democrats as evil people conspiring to take over the world!

So the dilemma for me is whether to continue to participate in political discussions. I have felt somewhat 'ganged up on' for the past year since I am so badly outnumbered in my daily interactions. I think that is wearing me out, in addition to having had several discussions recently that turned personal. At various times I have sworn off discussing politics, at work, at church, in email or on facebook! That usually lasts a week or two until some big issue (like health care reform) rolls around or someone else initiates the discussion (I truly believe that I am one of the very few 'liberals' that many of my friends know and they often look at me like I have 2 heads!)

I think I am probably incapable of shutting down that part of my life. But I think it's time to take a break. I am going to do my best to avoid talking politics for some (undefined) period of time. Of course I will remain interested (I am a political junkie) and will continue to read, but I promise that from now on I will only send politically tinged emails to like minded friends.

What have your experiences been? Have you noticed an increase in the emotional content of political discussions?

No pain, no gain

Not long ago I was asked what my passion in life was. Other than God and family, I thought for a moment and answered cycling. While I am by no means an 'avid cyclist' (prior to my herniated disk diagnosis in January 2008 I averaged about 1000 miles per year; I know lots of guys who do 2 and 3 times that), I still receive great pleasure from a good bike ride. The strength and rhythm of a good cadence over a flat stretch, the sense of accomplishment after a decent climb and the sheer exhiliration of going downhill at 35 miles per hour ... these are feelings I can get nowhere else in my life. After a ride I always experience the 'runners high' affect (without the sore knees!), and my energy level and enthusiasm for life is greatly increased.

That is why the disk issue has been such a downer for me. Last year I was limited to less than 300 miles, virtually all of it from rides of just 13 miles. My goal was to get back to rides of 30 to 70 miles, and to participate once again in the annual Multiple Sclerosis 2 day fundraiser ride in September (65 miles each day). Earlier this summer I was making progress, getting in several rides of 30 to 36 miles. However, every time I ride, I have to stop and stretch every 12 - 17 miles because the pain in my back and down my left leg make it impossible to go on. This alone prevents me from doing any group rides, no one wants to stop and wait while the cripple works out his back problems!

So all this leads to an interesting dilemma. On Saturday mornings I like to get up and have a leisurely breakfast, drink coffee and read the paper. I also want to go for a ride before it gets too hot. However it can be difficult to get up the motivation to ride when I know how much it's going to hurt. My wife is great, she encourages me to go, partly because she knows how much better a mood I will be in when I finish! If I can convince myself that the pleasure will outweigh the pain, then I can get up the energy and desire to go. This puts an interesting spin on the line that our high school gym coaches used to yell at us ... "No pain, No gain"!

Back pain sucks

I am writing this not (just) to whine about myself, but because I know that back pain is a near universal experience that most of us can relate to!

My history with back pain started on December 8, 1980. I remember that I played racquetball that morning with my good friend and coworker David Fryer (he was 'Da Fly' just as I was 'Da Mule' -- there's a funny story or two there but I will save that for another blog). I don't remember a specific play where I got hurt, I just remember that I was in quite a bit of pain most of that day. I was annoyed because I had to stay up late to watch the Monday Night Football game; I ran the weekly football pool at work. I remember the date vividly because, late in the game, Howard Cosell announced, in as dramatic a fashion as only Howard Cosell could muster, that John Lennon had been shot in New York City. I immediately (tried) to jump out of my recliner (the typical post college recliner with holes in the fabric), but instead fell flat on my face because my back would not cooperate. I literally crawled to the radio and turned it on to try and get more news about Lennon's condition.

So that began a lifetime of on and off pain in my lower back. I managed to work and play through it, with the help of my good friend Advil, until January or February of 2008. I suddenly started to feel severe pain in my left hamstring and calf. When this did not go away in a week or so, I made an appointment at the Emory Spine Center. Long story short, I had a herniated disk (L5S1) that was pushing on my sciatic nerve. I realized that I had been experiencing similar pain for a couple of years when riding more than 30 or 40 miles; I just attributed that to muscle pain and took Advil, but I realize now that was probably also due to the disk leaking out over time.

So, today, after a series of cortisone epidural injections and a year of resting and doing cores, I am mostly better. My cycling is still severely limited; I did manage 25 miles 2 weeks ago, but this past weekend I was in pain after 13 (I was in the middle of a 20 mile ride). I still have bad days however, which is why I am writing this blog - yesterday I sat at my desk in my home office for 5 hours catching up on email (I was out 2 days a month ago and had not been able to catch up!); then I drove an hour over to Marietta for a meeting with CCE (Coke bottler). Then I sat for 3 1/2 hours in this meeting (I did stand up to stretch several times); then I drove home in Atlanta traffic, which took an hour and a half. I was in pretty bad pain most of the way and had to stop and stretch mid way through. I got home, lay flat on my back for about an hour (made great progress in the book I have been trying to finish since March!), then did my cores. I felt better, but was still in enough pain to pick a few pointless arguments with my wife.

Now to the universal experience portion of this blog - pain in general can really sap your energy, but it seems to me that back pain is all encompassing. It's hard to do anything when your back hurts. I have several friends dealing with this now, one is about to undergo surgery. I was lucky to avoid that, but at one point last year I would have welcomed it if I thought that it would cure me. I never really 'felt old' until last year; I am hoping 2009 will be my 'rebirth' year and I can get back to where I was in '07. My dream is to ride in the MS ride again (I did 11 in a row from 1997 to 2007). That's a 65 mile ride 2 days in a row. It's in September, so I need to start building miles now. Wish me luck!

My dad

As Father's Day approaches I once again am stymied as to what to get my dad. I'll figure something out in the next day or two, but in the meantime, now that I have officially joined the blogosphere, I feel it is appropriate to dedicate a blog to him!

The best thing I can say about my dad is how much I always respected and admired him; my goal in life was to earn his respect and to one day be a husband and father that modelled him. Dad was not the kind of father to yell and scream and threaten us; I rarely if ever heard my mom say, "just wait until your father gets home." However, when I messed up, all he had to do was look at me with resignation and tell me how disappointed he was in me. Those were the words I most dreaded!

My dad is a product of the generation that came before women's lib; I don't believe he shared equally in the domestic chores around the house. What he did do was to get up every morning and go to work (I don't recall him ever 'calling in sick'). He did this without complaint; in fact I remember many mornings when the teenage me would be up moping over breakfast and he would give me a cheerful 'Good Morning!'; I would mumble something back and he would scold me for being morose and disrespectful. He modelled a very strong work ethic, and he exhibited airtight integrity. My brother and sister and I have very different personalities, but we all work hard and keep our word - if Jeff or Lisa tell me anything, I never have to wonder if they are being honest with me. To be sure, our mother exhibited these same qualities, so we had a double dose of good role modelling to learn from!

I am sure that there are many fathers of my dad's generation that practiced strong work ethics and high integrity; the "more unique" (that's for you dad!) aspect of my dad is that he is unafraid to show love and affection. He and mom were always very affectionate; even after 40 years of marriage their love for each other was plain for all to see. All us kids learned from them, and on my best days, I try to model that (unfortunately I inherited the 'fiery' side of my mom's personality rather than my dad's serene demeanor!). He has never been afraid to hug his kids, to this day we hug each other when we say goodbye.

I am so blessed by the parents I was lucky enough to have! Dad, I love you more than I can convey in words. Happy Father's Day!

I've joined the blogosphere!

This is my first blog - yes, I am that last person on earth who is not yet self-published! At least not until I publish this posting.

So what am I supposed to write about? I used to fancy myself a pretty good writer - heck I won a play writing contest in 8th Grade! We even got to stage it for the whole school and they gave me a cameo part (I am definitely NOT an actor). My first major in college was journalism, until I figured out that I didn't want to be writing obituaries for the Peoria Post for 5 years. I think I would have been a good reporter - maybe a war correspondent, or, better yet, a sportswriter! (I identified with Oscar Madison on the Odd Couple!). Recently I thought I might become a religious writer when I retire from my day job - maybe write Sunday School lessons. Who knows?

When I realized there was no money in journalism I switched my major to computer science (I have always been very practical). Back then, Ohio State was one of the first colleges to offer a computer science degree in the business college. I was a hot property after graduation; I tried to start a bidding war between IBM, Hewlett-Packard and NCR. I ended up at NCR and eventually made my way to EMC. A few years back I thought I was burned out and needed a career change, so I attended some sessions of the Crossroads Career course at church; I did enough surveys and skill assessments to learn that I should be doing something that combined social activity in a technical field ... which, as a pre sales consultant for a storage vendor, was exactly what I was doing! So I decided to bitch less and focus on the positive. To a large degree, I've been successful.

So no one really cares about my background, which brings me back to my opening question - what do I write about? This isn't Twitter, so I don't want to tell you that I had cereal for breakfast (again!). This isn't Facebook, so I don't want to tell you what my status is ("Brian is trying to write a blog"). However, I am fairly new to FB, and just joined Twitter this week (I have 2 followers, even though I have yet to tweet!). This is my 'going public' phase, I guess. The cool thing about Twitter was watching the #iranelection discussion the past few nights, with all the tweets out of Iran, and the links to YouTube videos of protesters getting beaten up.

So why a blog, why now (my wife wants to know)? I've thought about this for quite awhile, but just never got around to it, never had the time, etc (still don't). This morning on NPR they were talking about the new rules for job seekers; for example one hiring manager said that if he gets a paper resume and cover letter folded neatly inside an envelope he just throws it away. If it's not electronic, it doesn't exist. They said that many contacts are made through professional networking sites like LinkedIn (I'm on there but I don't have any recommendations). Then there was the throwaway comment that if you didn't exist online and if you didn't have a blog, then you were suspect. So that was the excuse I needed to start one!

Time will tell whether this is my last blog or whether I will actually post on a periodic basis. Right now I have to decide if I'm going to post this link on Facebook or just let it sit in the ether and see if anyone actually stumbles across it (maybe the slightly crude blog title will "attract a few flies" (sorry - bad pun!).

Thanks for reading!